2008: A Year in Review

The year is coming to a close and I thought it fitting that I take a moment to look back at everything (at least everything to my recollection) and at the same time update this out of date blog. I guess the most appropriate place to start would be the beginning. 2008 was, for me, in many ways a time for new beginnings and changes in my life. I don't think I have changed so much in the course of one year since puberty, even if this change was more mental than physical.
Fittingly, I rang in the new year my best Andrew. A toga party thrown by his parents left us both uncomfortable and engaged in lots of odd actives. From the almighty jam to grabbing some Socko's (our signature drink) to watching The Beatles Help!, it truly signified the odd arrangement of activities we would be starting and altering during the course of the year. We together have an innate ability to find the silver lining in any experience. From my constantly being dumped by the same person to his parents getting a divorce and moving to Texas, we have made the best out of everything, I'm even visiting him from the Dec. 27-Jan. 2! He has been my best friend since the 8th grade and I'm so glad to have a friend like him.
Now I can't review my year without talking about Brooke, a wonderful mistake, a horrible blessing, an experience I undoubtedly would repeat if for nothing else but to take away what I learned from the whole thing. I would like to start by recalling the first time she broke up with me. It was the day of my great grandmother's funeral, which I was attending when I get a text message from her saying "I quit." Not understanding the meaning of it at first she readily explained she was dumping me, while I was at a funeral... Well I had to leave the funeral early so I could go to work, where I was readily fired. So the day went funeral, dump, fired then back to funeral. This would set the tone of our relationship: a flurry of bad events would lead to her inevitably dumping me or hating me for caring. Quickly followed by Andrew and I having a great time, odd as it may sound. See the day after the funeral/dump/firing he and I went out got a Socko and I blew my last $200 on the amp that I am using to this day!
The '07-'08 school year went by rather uneventfully, it was summer that was the real bliss and the real horror of the year. The summer proved that Andrew and I are truly unrepeatable buddies and that Brooke was a cruel bitch. For one month, Andrew and I were constantly hanging out. From scrounging up whatever little change we could so we could get some drinks from QT or we had just run by a ton of money and were heading to Guitar Center, we did it all and then some. It was the most amazing summer ever so long as I had my buddy with me. We explored new musics, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Primus, The Beatles (they have been there all my life but The Beatles were new to Andrew), and it made our own music better. The first half of the summer was bliss, I thought I had it made: my best buddy and I always together, a loving girlfriend and a head full of bubbling madness, those were the days.
It was the second half when things started going to hell. Andrew's mom told us that she was going to marry an Air Force man, who I still suspect she cheated on her husband with. Less than two months after her divorce from her husband of eight years (I apologize Andrew if that number is wrong), who she had a child with, she was remarrying, and moving to a Texas border town. Andrew and I started counting down the days, each day bringing us closer to the inevitable separation.
Well he left and things got worse. It got to the point where Brooke was dumping me on a weekly basis, if not more often and when we did just so happen to be together she was pissed at me. In no way shape or form a healthy relationship. This went on until maybe a week into school and we haven't really even spoken since then.
September rolls around and I audition and get a part in my first play, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe with East Valley Children's Theatre (EVCT) as Fenris Ulf, who was, in my mind at least, the scariest character on stage. I met people there who have change my the way I look at the world, at myself, at the stage, and just made me think. Doing Narnia was among the most life changing experiences of my life so far. I would like to thank the entire cast of Narnia for they all changed my life, some people became good friends and helped make Narnia a possitive experience, whle others, mostly women, were complete bitches and helped make Narnia a possitive experience. Yes I learned as much from the jerks as I did from my friends. I know now that I'm one of those people who stands out in a crowd in a negative way. I'm a natural oddity and I embrace it, and I frighten those who are of a natural normality, a fact I somewhat enjoy. I know I will not be everyone's friend but to get anywhere in life I have to simply not care. I also learned, in the words of Tom, if a woman has anything in her past that could land you on Jerry Springer, don't date her, a fact that is, in fact, very true. Thank you Tom.
Narnia came and went with drama on and off stage. I became drawn into the center of this drama when two of the cast members broke up and I became the lady's boy toy, for lack of better words. This made me a few friends and, I'm quite sure, drew a few enemies. Not from other guys who were after her, just that her ex was pretty much every one's friend and I'm sure he made sure I became public enemy number one. But soon enough it was over, the dream long gone, just a memory.
The very last thing that I did with the few good people I met doing Narnia was possibly the single craziest night of my life! On Halloween a few of us went to go see The Rocky Horror Picture Show live, which is neither horrific nor conventional. Without a doubt the greatest gathering of freaks I've ever attended and, I must admit, I loved it! I had never seen the Picture Show before so I didn't really know what to expect. My mind was thoroughly blown. I would like to make it an annual event with the same crowd but if they don't want to come with me and I have to bring others, well that's cool with me too.
November came by and Sean turned 16! Now that is exciting even if he is still with out a permit! He's just being a lazy boob and there isn't anything I can do about it.
And here we are nearly caught up. This last Tuesday I auditioned for the next EVCT show called The Golden Butterfly, and amazing as it may sound I was cast yet again! This time I will be playing the part of Brash, The King of the Landsians, basically I'm a good guy this time and I get a sword!!! Fitting since I didn't in Narnia! Rehearsals start on January 5 and the show opens February 5, so it's going to be a hectic process but I'm exited none the less. I'm actually really excited for this show, I think it's going to be tons better than Narnia and Sean will also be in this one so come see the Brothers Bogle in thier joint stage bebut!!!
Here we are, at the end of a year to be remember. 2008 was, for me, something else, the dawning of a differently life for me. I'm expecially excited for Dec. 27 because, like I said, I'll be flying out San Antonio, Texas where I'll meet up with my heterosexual life mate, the guitar man himself: Andrew! We'll head down to his house in Del Rio, Texas where we will ring in 2009 the same way we did 2008, jamming!
Thank you to all of my friends and family for being the most wonder people I could ever hope to have in my life. Thank you all for helping to shape me into the person I am today. Thank you for your love, your kindness, and your ability to put up with my madness. I love you all.

This is the End (?)

Well Narnia has been over for some time now and I realized I haven't given anyone a proper account my experience with my first show.

First of all I would like to thank all of you who came to see me perform: Elise, Kas, Zoey, Megan, Ruben, Moe, Lauren, Diann, Hailey, Sydney, and Emily (no not the aunt the friend from school, I am still pissed that the Emily didn't show up, well maybe not upset). You all rock, please tell me what you thought of the show, and me of course!

Doing 16 performances of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe was a wonderful, horrible, life changing event! I'm so glad for all the friends I made while doing this show and for the experience of performing live in such a way. I have to say that I loved being Fenris Ulf! Just being able to act out being a wolf was incredible! And not "just a wolf" the wolf, the only villain with a name(the witch/queen has a name but it's never used to address her)! Half of the only one-on-one fight scene. I have established a real back story for him which really helped me to bring him to life, in case anyone was wondering why it was so good lol jkjk

Also for anyone I didn't tell I was actually on stage the entire show! See after my death scene I had to run behind the stone table to break it, which was hell. The actual breaking of the table wasn't a problem, it was some of the other people involved with the scene changes and them not putting trees where they belong. Just a little fun fact for all of you who are interested.

Since this is over now I'm looking forward to my next acting endeavor. I have two possibilities that I am considering. First, and the most likely to happen, is the next show at EVCT, The Golden Butterfly, auditions are Dec. 8th and 9th. This is very appealing for the fact that there are people at EVCT that I really like and hope to see at this show. Furthermore, after my last show with them I feel I could get very far if I continue to work with them. The other is Arsenic and Old Lace with Desert Ridge Theatre. Problem with this show is that I am very unlikely to get a good part considering the director doesn't like me, it would force Sean and Stacie to stay after school, which I know they hate, and there would only be 3 performances, I know this sounds like it should be a good thing but I honestly enjoyed doing 16 shows. On the other hand it would make my standings in high school drama better and if I choose to pursue theatre into college, I think at least one high school show would look good. Any suggestions?

Once again thanks to all of you who came. I look forward to doing more shows where ever it may be and seeing more of you come out as I develop my abilities!!!

Birthdays and Lions

So it has been a while since my last post and there are a few questions, well one question that needs to be answered, so I'm putting it all in my BIRTHDAY POST!!!

Today I am 17 years old! Wow can you believe it, I'm soooo old lol. I must be honest, these things are getting less and less exciting, especially as less and less people care. This birthday has honestly sucked thus far =( Only one of my friends actually remember it, and that rocks because she told me happy birthday before my mom did, or maybe that sucks. But I woke up getting yelled at and then my ex made me feel like crap, and...things haven't gotten better. I honestly hate today. I'm just having a really really bad day =( it just sucks =( I would really like for something good to happen but I'm not holding my breath. I know how horrible and selfish I sound but I mean it is my birthday, it should be about me, but I feel ignored today.

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe!!! People are wanting show times. Well here they are:

October 9-12, 2008, Thurs – Sat at 7 pm, Sat at 4 pm, Sun at 2 pm

October 17-19, 2008, Fri – Sat at 7 pm, Sat at 4 pm, Sun at 2 pm

October 24-26, 2008, Fri – Sat at 7 pm, Sat at 4 pm, Sun at 2 pm

Come see the show and support my supporting role in the whole thing

Mike is an actor?

On August 29th I went to East Valley Childrens Theatre to audition for a part in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe which was absolutely marvelous. First we did a dance as animals. Its was a sort of ethreal Celtic animal thing, but it was great fun. Next we were marched into another room to do cold readings, which is where they give you part of the script and say "OK read." I felt I did fairly well at this. Finally, and this was the kicker, they had us pretend we were monsters in the witches army. They told us at the very beginning that they had seen too many cat like creatures so I knew to steer clear of that. Everyone was still getting down low and making little kitty like roars and screeches, so when it was my turn to go up I decided to do something completely different. The director said go and I get as tall as I can and let out a deep monstrous. I went around just roaring at people until I get to this kid who must have been 11 years-old. I roar at him and he roars back, so I roar back at him and we get into this roaring fight for dominance! Imagine that!!! Less than an hour later I get a call from them asking me to come back for the second round of auditions!

August 30th I come back for round two! This one was a bit more intense, bit more talent, bit more technical. Out of 131 people who originally auditioned 60 were chosen to come back for round 2 and only half of that 60 would get a part. It all started with some more cold readings. A few of the older girls read for the White Witch and the rest of us read for either the animals or the kids. I read for Peter (the oldest one real father figure) once and Edmund (the younger boy who turns everyone into the White Witch). I knew I couldn't be cast as Edmund which didn't bother me, but being cast as Peter, a leading role, in my first play was a possibility that was too good in my mind.

After the cold readings we sat and played some improve games so some of the people there could see if we had what it takes to be in the East Valley Childrens Theatre Improv Troupe, which I was asked to join amazingly enough! This was also to give the the choreographer a chance to give people a second go at a more technical dance.

They sent us in to do the dance in groups of 12. The dance this time was a fighting dance! Of course, we were still animals, and the dance made sure we knew it and at the end was a spear thrust. We had two try's to get it right, which i was very thankful for. Believe it or not, I have no dance training so doing this was a real challenge for me. I got a good feel for it on the second try.

Finally they had us pretend we were animals in Narnia again. This time we weren't monsters just animals or creatures and we had to react to something happening. I decided to take the route of a faun, which everyone interpreted as Tumnus, who I did in fact wanted to be cast as.

That was it, all that was left was to hope for a call back. I waited all night and eventually started freaking out because it was getting late and I didn't think they were going to call. I was right, at least for the time being.

On August 31 around 12:30 I got a call! A lady, who I think was the stage manager, called asking me if I would like to take the part of Fenris Ulf!!! The big bad wolf leader of the White Witches secret police!!! First rehearsal is on September 1st at 5pm, they are going to explain things and get me sized up for the costume! I'm so excited! I also expect most of you to come to East Valley Childrens Theare production of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe! I'll tell you when I opens as soon I figure it out myself!

Chills

This song gives me chills
Love the music
Love the lyrics
Love the message
Love the ban
Plus I can play this song (well no the solo)

Soul Searching

Life is such a miraculous, mysterious, marvelous and scary thing. Day by day I find my life changing. Sometimes it seems like everything is going right then it all comes crashing down. Other times it seemed like the world was ending then something miraculous happens. This last summer has been full of amazing events that have changed my life and, looking back, this may have been the best summer of my life. Not because I went on some wonderful vacation or spent everyday laughing in the sun with good friends. No quite the opposite in fact, but this summer I have learned more about myself than ever before.

"The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask"
-Jim Morrison

Now I'm sure some of you are wondering why I'm putting that quote. It's not just because someone famous said it, or because The Doors are one of my favorite band (that may be how I found it but that's aside the point). I read this and it smashed my face with truth.

During this last school year someone close to me asked me "Who are you?" and the only response I could think of was "I don't know..." Then this person answered for me, and nothing came of it for a while, but I kept thinking about it "who are you?" A question that would haunt anyone who asked that of themselves. It started to really bug me "who are you?" Those three words repeated themselves in my mind daily. I started to realize that almost everything I did, I did for someone else. Even those things that made me happiest in the world, they started as trying to make someone else happy. I had put on a mask, at a very young age, to make other people happy. I had forgotten how to please me, how to make myself happy.

As I have said this summer has gone from amazing to horrible, and from horrible to wonderful at the drop of a hat. From the best times I could ask for with my best friend to saying good-bye to him as he left for Texas. From holding my girlfriend close to getting dumped then getting back together. From dealing with having little girls in house to missing them. From having absolutely no money for school or books or food to getting almost everything we need with one paycheck. From ecstasy to melancholy and back again.

A few weeks ago this person once again came to me and said "I don't know who you are and I can tell you don't know who you are either and it's upsetting you," or something to that affect and suggested I take a week to soul search. So I did, or at least tried. Having girls with us made it nearly impossible to seclude myself in my room for much more than a couple of hours. But it was a good week, or so. I kept a journal (which anyone who would like to is welcome to read) writing whatever I was feeling, glimpses into the past, feelings on things that were going on and whatever else just so happened to pop into my head. It really helped me to figure everything out and work though any emotions that may have popped up while I was searching.

I few days of soul searching turned out to be all I needed. I discovered some marvelous things about myself and found confidence in myself that I never had before. I also had a realization about what I was doing: searching. Searching for something is pointless if it hasn't been created. Who I am is still a work in progress. I still have time, might still have a chance, to be whatever the hell I want to be, to do whatever the hell I want to do. I am F-R-E-E. I had for so long confined myself in self doubt and fear. I can, and am, still becoming the person I want to be. No one can tell me "You can't" or "It's impossible." No I will do whatever I can and become the person I want to be.

Summer Lovin'

So it has been a LONG while since I posted anything on here and Elise made me feel guilty for not so here I am posting like I promised.

The last day of school for was probabally a once in a blue moon short of thing for Arizona: it rained. On the last day of school, when its supposed to be hot and terrible outside, it rained! What a great way to end the year.

Girls came to town on Friday! Which has been amazingly fun and amazingly stressful. I have learned a lot about parenthood and have gained a new respect for parents. They have made me laugh, made me mad, made me tired, annoyed, greatful, hurt, hungery, loved and just about everything bad and good. I'm glad they are here and I want them gone. I have discovered a lot about my own family when put under a combination stress me not wanting to at home (it makes them hate me). But it really has been a great expierence having the girls. I love them to death and will miss them when they're gone. Here's a few pictures.

(CC wanted me to take a picture of her)

(Raia fell asleep better the chair and the desk)

Later the next week Andrew and I got to take a trip down to Guitar Center!!! Quite possibly the best trip I have ever taken. I discover my dream bass! The Schecter Stiletto. It blew me away. Amazing playability, great sound, light, good color. I cant even describe oh great it felt to play it. It was like falling in love with bass all over again. We got a crappy picture of me playing it but here it is.

(I love the natural look!!!)

And just yesterday I got to see everyone for a little while Brooke and I took some pictrues. Elise you are amazing! I cant wait to see them, and yes I'll put them up on here for anyone else who wants to see them. But it was great to see everyone especially Chris! It seems so long since I got to hang out with everybody. I want to come over more often but the shortage of a job, gas and money makes it hard for me to get the car at all. But I have had a few interviews and I'm hoping one of them will pull through.

Spring Break

Well its that time again. The time when foods of teenagers and college students flock to to Mexico, Vegas, California or various lakes arcoss Arizona. School is out and its time to enjoy our homes, our friends and our families. Oh breaks are so...boring.

Yeah I'm not digging this break so much. Snice loosing my job I have found myself once again broke and, since the folks working at Basha's are lazy as hell, I have yet to begin making money again. So Lisa is taking the car most every day to work, just call me M.I.A.

This break hasn't been all bad, though I wont be going up to Page like I had hoped (sorry Em). I got to spend some time with Brooke on Tuesday before she left for her trek the next day. It was fun she bought me some books, or more her mom bought me some books. Unfortunately I forgot them at her house and by the time I realized I had it was too late to come back over. Well I'll get them when she gets home on Saturday or at school.

I hung out with Andrew and we have jammed a few times. We've got down some songs and we have some new video's up on YouTube but I don't really like most of them. I've got down a good slap and pop technique so we're getting some great sounds out of it. I've also messed with destortions and found some more fun sounds out of that. I've discovered I enjoy player slower than Andrew does, which has caused some problems mostly in me being dominated. We both have 50 watt amps but his is a tube amp so it has a bit more power just from that.

I don't know whats going on for Easter or anyone wants to hang out drop me a line, I need to get out of this place.

Darfur Now

Please eveyone go to this link and read the blog about Darfur.

http://theworldbleeds.blogspot.com/

recently I have been very moved to help those in needm to help those who hurt, those who need help from me.

Please read it

Life in Motion

Life is not like a box of chocolates. Life is more like a roller coaster. You thought you knew what you were getting into but when its finally your turn to ride you realize you didn't see all the twists and turns. Life is in motion, it changes. What is real today, may not be real tomorrow.


(If you think that sounds phylisophical, just know, I'm not here to enlighten you.)





So I feel an update is in order. Life as you may know is constantly in motion and, for me, it just changed. Not long ago I posted a blog about a break up and losing a job. Well things have changed since then.

One day after breaking up Brooke and I got back together. She is so amazing. Everyday I am with her she makes me happy. She is the most amazing thing to ever happen to me second only to being born. She has helped me, she has changed my life in so many ways. I love her. She is everything to me. There is a magical connection between us. We have been through bad and we have been through good and no matter what we find each other hold each other tight and everything is made better. She is so amazing. People see us together and tell us how amazing we are together. I have helped her too. She has helped me become a better person and I have helped her face her demons. I have found a woman who makes me so happy, with just a look from her beautiful brown eyes makes my day. Holding her makes my week. Watching a movie with her makes me...I can't even say. I don't know much about love or knowing when you find it or how to keep it, but I truly believe I have found a woman I truly love. I know I'm only 16 but why should an age keep you from love?

As for a job I have found a new job at Basha's along side Lisa! Yes yes I know, she works at Starbucks but the Starbucks is inside the Basha's like it often is these days. I dont know when I start but the job is locked up.

I am so happy right now. My life is so good right now. I could not be happier

All Hell Breaks Loose

Yesterday was an incrediblly terrible day. Just flat out sucked. Three things happened yesterday to completely ruin my day my weekend and my just tear me down when life seemed at its peek.

To start the day off I had to leave school for a fueneral for my Great Gandma Standage, always a god sign of things to come. I feel bad though because in that room full of people eyes red with tears, I had one to shed for this lady. I did not know her. Any death is terrible but I could not shed a tear for this woman, whom without I would not exist. I can't help but feel like I have no reason to cry for her. I want to, I want to mourn and he sad for the loss of her in our lives and rejoice because she is in a better place but I can't I just can't.

I had to leave the services myself because I had to work, or at least I thought I did. I, with my mom, went to Hot Dog on a Stick to start my schedualed shift. When I get there my boss tells me to come around front (we always use the backdoor to get to work). "This can't be good" I decide as I made my way around. She fired me. Apparently I am not clean enough for those anal freaks so I am out of a job. So my day so far is: leave school-go to fueneral-about to tell you-get fired. Yay me.

There is one thing I left out though. Between the fueneral and getting fired something else happened, something to ruin my day completely and totally and just break my spirit. We had just gotten back from the burial and went to a relatives for a lunch and memorial service. While there I didn't really care what was going on so I decided to text my girlfriend while I was dosing off. In short she freaked out that we are getting too close and that she's not used to someone caring about her (her family is pretty uncaring at times) and she broke up with me... So now I'm freaking out and completely distraut, but I'm working through it.

God I feel like the cards have all been dealt agaist me. That no matter how hard I try I just get nothing in ther end. I feel like someone is against me and just screwing me over time and time again.

And here's the icing on this cake of despair: I had to get a refund for that amp I bought and I'm not acually getting any money from it. I HAVE NO AMP. I can't even hear myself play. And this morning I got pulled over becase I failed to yeild at a stop sign luckily enough the officer let me off with a warning. So I guess my one bit of god luck came from not so good luck.

huh....I want a goose....I think it would cheer me up....or you know what a swift kick in the nuts, that would just make my day!!!

More News

The Bad: So here's how it went down...We filmed those two videos on Monday under the impression that I was going to get a 50 watt amp. Well I did. Problem being I took the amp out of the box and I was excited, I was estatic. I looked over examined all the features, knobs, pedal (yes it came with a pedal to switch it from clean to distored). It was amazing! Then I plugged it in gentling giving it a little volume and stuck the G string to start playing Pigs (Three Different Kinds)...and it buzzed. I took it out of the box and it was blown out. Thank you Musicians Friend and UPS for making sure that my amp was taken care of! Right now I am just trying to decide if I should keep on trying to get a hold of Musicians Friend (every time i call I get a machine saying "All circuits are busy, try again later") or just take it to Richardson's (the music store at Superstition Springs Mall) have them fix it but that would void the warrenty... =( Any suggestions?

The Good: I would like to thank Elise for giving me what is perhapse the best (late) birthday present I ever got: a picture of me and Dad and a key chain of said picture! It came at the perfect time. Folks I have been thinking a lot about my dad lately and it sometimes seems hard for me to remember a whole lot about him... It seems theres so much I don't know. Please everyone who reads this, leave a comment about a memory you have with my dad. Good, Bad, funny, serious, goofy or enlightening; I want to hear it. Just so you all know, you can thank Brooke for getting me to think about him. Without even trying to she got me to talk about him. I realized that I don't really talk about him, but I miss him. I wounder how his influence would have changed me. Would I be more like him? Am I more like him then I realize?

You asked for it, and now your gonna get it

You have been asking and wondering "Mike, when are we going to get to hear you play?" Well folks I'm gonna do you one better! We filmed it! Right now we are a two man band going by the name Muddy Thunder. I appologize for the poor quality of my bass in these video, I have been working with an electric guitar amp for a while now, but I am getting a 50 watt Crate Bass amp on the 23 of January (i think). Right now the only videos are covers but soon enough there will be original works.

Muddy Thunder's YouTube page!

More to come, I promise