Life is not like a box of chocolates. Life is more like a roller coaster. You thought you knew what you were getting into but when its finally your turn to ride you realize you didn't see all the twists and turns. Life is in motion, it changes. What is real today, may not be real tomorrow.
(If you think that sounds phylisophical, just know, I'm not here to enlighten you.)
So I feel an update is in order. Life as you may know is constantly in motion and, for me, it just changed. Not long ago I posted a blog about a break up and losing a job. Well things have changed since then.
One day after breaking up Brooke and I got back together. She is so amazing. Everyday I am with her she makes me happy. She is the most amazing thing to ever happen to me second only to being born. She has helped me, she has changed my life in so many ways. I love her. She is everything to me. There is a magical connection between us. We have been through bad and we have been through good and no matter what we find each other hold each other tight and everything is made better. She is so amazing. People see us together and tell us how amazing we are together. I have helped her too. She has helped me become a better person and I have helped her face her demons. I have found a woman who makes me so happy, with just a look from her beautiful brown eyes makes my day. Holding her makes my week. Watching a movie with her makes me...I can't even say. I don't know much about love or knowing when you find it or how to keep it, but I truly believe I have found a woman I truly love. I know I'm only 16 but why should an age keep you from love?
As for a job I have found a new job at Basha's along side Lisa! Yes yes I know, she works at Starbucks but the Starbucks is inside the Basha's like it often is these days. I dont know when I start but the job is locked up.
I am so happy right now. My life is so good right now. I could not be happier
Monday, February 25, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
All Hell Breaks Loose
Yesterday was an incrediblly terrible day. Just flat out sucked. Three things happened yesterday to completely ruin my day my weekend and my just tear me down when life seemed at its peek.
To start the day off I had to leave school for a fueneral for my Great Gandma Standage, always a god sign of things to come. I feel bad though because in that room full of people eyes red with tears, I had one to shed for this lady. I did not know her. Any death is terrible but I could not shed a tear for this woman, whom without I would not exist. I can't help but feel like I have no reason to cry for her. I want to, I want to mourn and he sad for the loss of her in our lives and rejoice because she is in a better place but I can't I just can't.
I had to leave the services myself because I had to work, or at least I thought I did. I, with my mom, went to Hot Dog on a Stick to start my schedualed shift. When I get there my boss tells me to come around front (we always use the backdoor to get to work). "This can't be good" I decide as I made my way around. She fired me. Apparently I am not clean enough for those anal freaks so I am out of a job. So my day so far is: leave school-go to fueneral-about to tell you-get fired. Yay me.
There is one thing I left out though. Between the fueneral and getting fired something else happened, something to ruin my day completely and totally and just break my spirit. We had just gotten back from the burial and went to a relatives for a lunch and memorial service. While there I didn't really care what was going on so I decided to text my girlfriend while I was dosing off. In short she freaked out that we are getting too close and that she's not used to someone caring about her (her family is pretty uncaring at times) and she broke up with me... So now I'm freaking out and completely distraut, but I'm working through it.
God I feel like the cards have all been dealt agaist me. That no matter how hard I try I just get nothing in ther end. I feel like someone is against me and just screwing me over time and time again.
And here's the icing on this cake of despair: I had to get a refund for that amp I bought and I'm not acually getting any money from it. I HAVE NO AMP. I can't even hear myself play. And this morning I got pulled over becase I failed to yeild at a stop sign luckily enough the officer let me off with a warning. So I guess my one bit of god luck came from not so good luck.
huh....I want a goose....I think it would cheer me up....or you know what a swift kick in the nuts, that would just make my day!!!
To start the day off I had to leave school for a fueneral for my Great Gandma Standage, always a god sign of things to come. I feel bad though because in that room full of people eyes red with tears, I had one to shed for this lady. I did not know her. Any death is terrible but I could not shed a tear for this woman, whom without I would not exist. I can't help but feel like I have no reason to cry for her. I want to, I want to mourn and he sad for the loss of her in our lives and rejoice because she is in a better place but I can't I just can't.
I had to leave the services myself because I had to work, or at least I thought I did. I, with my mom, went to Hot Dog on a Stick to start my schedualed shift. When I get there my boss tells me to come around front (we always use the backdoor to get to work). "This can't be good" I decide as I made my way around. She fired me. Apparently I am not clean enough for those anal freaks so I am out of a job. So my day so far is: leave school-go to fueneral-about to tell you-get fired. Yay me.
There is one thing I left out though. Between the fueneral and getting fired something else happened, something to ruin my day completely and totally and just break my spirit. We had just gotten back from the burial and went to a relatives for a lunch and memorial service. While there I didn't really care what was going on so I decided to text my girlfriend while I was dosing off. In short she freaked out that we are getting too close and that she's not used to someone caring about her (her family is pretty uncaring at times) and she broke up with me... So now I'm freaking out and completely distraut, but I'm working through it.
God I feel like the cards have all been dealt agaist me. That no matter how hard I try I just get nothing in ther end. I feel like someone is against me and just screwing me over time and time again.
And here's the icing on this cake of despair: I had to get a refund for that amp I bought and I'm not acually getting any money from it. I HAVE NO AMP. I can't even hear myself play. And this morning I got pulled over becase I failed to yeild at a stop sign luckily enough the officer let me off with a warning. So I guess my one bit of god luck came from not so good luck.
huh....I want a goose....I think it would cheer me up....or you know what a swift kick in the nuts, that would just make my day!!!
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